Nightmares
by Ze Smutteh Emo
Summary: Gray's nightmares have been getting out of hand to the point where his guildmates are starting to abandon him. As he comes closer to a breaking point, will Lyon be able to help him ease those dreams? And what of the mysterious, soothing melody from Gray's memories? Who is the person behind the song that has saved him more than once?
1. Prologue

**_Pairing: _**_Lyon x Gray_

**_Warnings:_**_ Angst_

**_Chapter rating:_**_ T_

**_Disclaimer: _**_I do not own Fairy Tail or any of its characters (but I think we can all guess what would happen if I did~)_

**_A/N:_**_ Damn it, distracted by another side project again. This story actually came to be from a really spontaneous idea. I won't say too much here - I'll start commenting from the next chapter forward. All I can say is that I think I may have a thing for writing depressing things with Fairy Tail. Damn... I'm awful!_

* * *

_I have a well-kept secret that no one knows of. _

_I feel ashamed to admit it as I should have grown out of it years ago, yet it comes back to haunt me now and then. I have done everything I possibly can to try and stop this problem, but it has only become worse as of late._

_I suffer from nightmares._

_These are not just the kind of nightmares that all people every so often. Most have dreamt of falling down, getting hurt... perhaps even killed. I have too. However, those dream pale in comparisons to what I call nightmares._

_These are the sort of dreams that will wake you up in the middle of the night, feeling utmost pain and despair. They will keep you from trying to sleep for days out of fear that you will return to the nightmare. Even the slightest things in your surroundings will remind you of what you saw and even when you close your eyes, you can feel it creeping under your skin._

_The worst part is that you cannot even tell yourself that they are 'just dreams'. They are more than that. Far more. These dreams are my reality. For 10 long years, I have had these nightmares repeat themselves over and over. I have to go through every day, reliving the nightmares when they come along - nightmares, that serves as a constant reminder of my powerlessness. ._

_But when the nightmares come and I think that this time they will break me for sure, I can hear a voice. It is not speaking, but rather singing to me. I cannot hear the words, but the melody reaches my heart and, a like a lullaby, it chases away the bad dreams._

_I do not remember the song - perhaps it is part of a long lost memory. All I know is that without that melody, without that voice... I would not be able to live with the nightmares._


	2. Chapter 1: Insomniac

**_Pairing: _**_Lyon x Gray_

**_Warnings:_**_ Angst. Plenty of it_

**_Chapter rating:_**_ T_

**_Disclaimer: _**_I do not own Fairy Tail or any of its characters (but maybe I should talk to Mashima about handing me a character or two? :3)_

**_A/N:_**_ Alright, so where did the idea for this whole 'nightmare' thing actually come from? Well, let's just say that it has something to do with a particular seiyuu and his OH-SO-BEAUTIFUL singing voice. More about that in later chapters. Discussing that now would be a total spoiler. Yeah.  
So... I'm probably being a bit mean towards Gray here, but I still adore him~ And having this project does not mean that 'You Are Mine' won't continue - it will, trust me - but this one will be much like 'Sadame' in terms of length, perhaps shorter. It depends on where the characters take me x'D  
Some of the things in this fanfiction _is_ based on personal experience on dealing with anxiety and such. That is one of the reasons why I decided to write it. It actually helps me too. I hope you can bear with that fact OTL Like Gray, I, too, have a particular piece of music that helps to calm me down when I have panic attacks. Again, I hope you will still enjoy the story OTL_

"Morning Gray!"

A chirping voice called out to me as I entered the guild hall. Waving at the whitehaired woman, I went to the bar and slunked down on one of the chairs. Hearing me let out a loud sigh, she handed me a glass of water from behind the desk with a worried expression on her face.

"Are you alright? You look tired." Her light frown made it clear that she was demanding an answer. "Are you getting enough sleep?"

"I came home late last night," I replied, taking a sip of the water. I did not help in the least to reduce my fatigue. "I couldn't sleep any longer either, so I thought I'd come here early." I pretended to scout around the hall for a moment. "Not a lot of people here yet. I hope you don't mind my company."

"Of course not, silly. Though you do look like _you_ need the company of a soft bed and a warm blanket."

I could let out a sigh of relief when Mira finally decided to turn her attention to the few other members present. It was a tough fight just trying to keep my eyes open. It had been a lie that I 'came home late' and 'couldn't sleep'. It was not possible to tell Mira, nor anyone else in the guild for that matter, what the real reason behind my lack of sleep was.

As my eyes closed shot for a second, I was immediately back in my dream, surrounded by flames. I nearly tumbled off the chair as I jolted up, my heart throbbing wildly in my chest. I received several looks, both from Mira and others nearby. Smiling meekly at them, I stood up and headed for the door.

I needed some fresh air.

* * *

I could still feel my heart stuck in my throat as I found myself at the river flowing through town, trying to catch my breath. I must have been running without realizing it - running to try and escape the dreams that refused to let go of my thoughts. Sitting down at the river bank, I looked into the water at my own reflection.

I looked _horrible_. Heavy dark bags were visible under my half-lidded eyes and my hair was all messed up. I had not bothered in the least about fixing it before leaving home earlier. Grunting, I tried to straighten it the best I could with little success. I was such a mess.

It was not just my hair - everything was a mess and had been for months now. The nightmares had strengthened their grasp and I was beginning to lack the will to fight them. My friends kept getting hurt when heading out on missions with me and, considering how pitiful I looked in their eyes, they would not let me go alone.

The latest victim of my weakness had been Lucy. As tired out as I had been, my vision failed me at a critical time and instead of hitting my target with lances of ice, I had almost hit Lucy. Luckily she had gotten out of the way at the last second, spraining her ankle in the process.

Needless to say, Natsu had been furious. So had Erza. Both of them had yelled at me for being so careless. I had not even bothered to raise protests. Neither did I have the guts to apologize to Lucy afterwards. The three of them had been avoiding me for the past week and a half.

Juvia had tried to make amends between them and me, saying that it had probably been an accident. Her actions had only further angered Natsu as he claimed that I needed someone else to speak up for me since I was just a coward. Despite my reluctance to fight in my sorry state, I had launched myself at him.

For the first time, I had been sorely defeated by Natsu before Erza had even had the time to interfere. At that point, my guildmates had started guessing something was wrong. Fortunately none of them had actually approached me to find out just what the issue was.

Most likely my own fault for alienating everyone and being such an idiot.

"This is some fucked up shit..."

I buried my face in my hands, feeling an inner urge to just scream out in frustration, but I kept it within. The only thing that would get me would be a bunch of weird looks. I got enough of those already as it was. However, no sooner had I covered my eyes before that enormous monster appeared before me again.

Even as I forced myself to look up at the sky to try and lose sight of it, I could still feel my body trembling. I had to bite my lip to hold back tears. My fingers dug into my palms to the point where I was sure they would draw blood.

Then I started humming the melody that I so often heard in my dreams. As I began feeling more sure, I raised my voice, noting how a surge of calm and safety came over me. It was strange how a single song could hold that much power, but it always managed to help.

At the very least for a little while.

* * *

I ended up spending two hours at the river bank, finally able to close my eyes and get some rest thanks to the song. I felt a little better afterwards - partly thanks to getting some sleep and partly due to the protection of the mysterious melody. At one point, I decided to head back to the guild hall, since I still had the entire day to spend.

I regretted making that decision as I came closer to the guild. As I passed a corner, I came across the odd trio I would usually have been hanging around. However, as of late I had stayed as far away from them as possible.

"Ah, Gray. It's been a while."

Lucy shot me a wide smile that I did my best to return, although it was difficult with the pinkhaired Dragon Slayer sending me death glares from the side. It seemed he still had to support her due to her injured foot. The blue cat did not look too pleased either.

"Let's go, Lucy. We've got no business here."

_Brushed off, _I thought. Natsu did not even acknowledge my presence anymore. I could not even get worked up over the fact - he was absolutely right to be pissed on his comrade's behalf. Lucy was apparantly unable to remain angry, although I would rather have that she were. It would have made me feel better for ignoring her all this time.

"But, Natsu-!"

Natsu almost dragged her along down the street, towards the guild. Happy shot me a last sorry glance before he floated after the two. I felt like slamming my fist into a wall. It did not seem that I would be able to stick with those guys for the next long period of time.

Another sting of pain went through my chest as I realized that those three were not the only ones I might not be able to talk for a while. Considering that Lucy was Loke's 'master', I doubted that he wanted to have anything to do with me either, despite how close we once were.

"This is getting out of hand..."

"Trouble in paradise?"

I spun around, able to recognize that voice just about anywhere. While I usually would have rolled my eyes and talked back to him, I did not have any spare energy to spend on that.

"Lyon... what sort of business do you have in Magnolia of all places?"

The question came out rather flat compared to what I had hoped. It did not seem to affect Lyon at all. Rather, he simply stood there, hand on his waist and staring at me with cold eyes - the same as he usually did.

"I heard rumors that a certain Fairy Tail wizard kept mucking up his missions." He came closer, taking a good look on my face. "I can see _why_. With how you look, it is no wonder you can't do things right. When did you last get a good night's sleep?"

"Why do people always ask me that?"

"Ever considered there might be a reason for that?"

"...what do you care?"

Despite how I kept snapping back at him, Lyon did not appear the least bit annoyed - at least not any more than he was on average. I could not help but to wonder why he even bothered talking to me - I honestly doubted that he was _that_ interested in my health.

"Your guildmates seem to care. Juvia was completely out of it when I talked to her earlier. She _pleaded_ me to go talk to you." Lyon's words made me click my tongue quietly. Of course he had that kind of reason to see me. "And considering how those three before were looking at you, I'd say I was right in doing so. You need help, Gray."

"Need help?" I snorted, clenching my fists. I was too tired to listen to one of his 'I-know-better-than-you'-lectures. "I don't _need_ your help and I certainly don't _want_ it either. Just leave me the hell alone!"

Before I could turn on my heel and leave, Lyon had grabbed my arm. As I tried to pull it back, it became obvious that he did not intend to let me go. Gritting my teeth, I realized I had to go along with his will. I did not have the physical strength to fight him. Not with how tired I was.

"Good boy. Now, you're coming with me. You and I are going to have a little chat."


End file.
